Today, my question
to you is :
What or who are you comparing yourself to ?
If resonate with this, what is it costing you?
The word comparison
defined in the dictionary is “a consideration or estimate of the similarities
or dissimilarities between two things or people”. Did you know that one of the
ways we unconsciously evaluate things and people is partly by comparison but
when this becomes a negative habit and turns into unhealthy competition it can
literally take you out and be a serious energy drainer?
By nature, I am not the kind of person who goes into competing with others, trying to be better than the next person, but I love to inspire and uplift and share my knowledge I have with whomever is receptive to it. However, I can honestly say I am quite competitive with myself where I believe in always improving myself where I can and need to. When I know more, I do more. When I know better, I do better. When I learn more, I share more. I love working at quite a fast pace, am super organized and can literally multi-task with my eyes closed. I am convinced this must be from my earlier years as an aerobics instructor. Having to move in time with the music, count, talk and que your next move before it happens and do this all backwards to mirror image the class! Evolving and re-inventing the way in which I work and do things for me just works and is in alignment with my personality.
But for some this can seem totally overwhelming and thoughts of how can I keep up with such an energetic person? I feel totally useless, exhausted, not good enough and so the comparison starts…
He/She can do … I can’t … He/She seems … I am not … He/She has…. I don’t have …. and so on…. Then you may find yourself tossing the other side of the coin trying to find fault with this person to try derail them to make yourself feel better… thoughts such as He/She is the problem, He/She has to be the problem! No one should be able to do all this and still have more energy at the end of the day…. and so, the competition plays out in your head. Sadly, this can have a very negative impact on your self-confidence and self-esteem and your relationships.
Comparing yourself and negatively competing with someone else is never going to get you to where you want to be. Firstly, because you will always be comparing which always puts you behind the person. Secondly your goals and life situation and circumstances are definitely different and quite possibly worlds apart. What you want from life and where you are going, you can be sure of, is quite different from what they want and where they are going. So, comparing yourself to others, what they can achieve, what they have and what they do, is only going to set you up for disappointment. By focusing on someone else and trying to chase and keep up with them means you are only wasting more time and energy focused on them and what you can’t be like, leaving yourself dissatisfies and exhausted. At the same time, you are losing sight of yourself and what’s actually important to you and your life in order to grow.
My advice here is to just let people be who they are, and you be who you are. We are all so wonderfully and uniquely made. We all run at different tempo’s, so allow others to run at their pace and you to run at yours. Some people love to do the same things for years and some love to keep evolving and this is ok. Neither is wrong or right. Its what’s right for you that’s key. The relief and pressure release you will feel will be huge if you stop comparing and competing with other and refocus your attention onto yourself.
By refocusing your attention on YOU, your work life and personal life can only improve.
Refocus on improving and balancing yourself Spiritually, Mentally, Emotionally, Physically and Energetically for overall wellness. What are your core beliefs and values? Build on these to live authentically and daily by them. Full your mind with knowledge and wise kind words and then share this knowledge and kindness with others. Let go of anger and resentment and forgive to set yourself free to be happy.
Finally, to ensure your
entire energy system is working beautifully, is to exercise your body and feed
it with nourishing supportive foods.
Comparing and competing with others only robs you of your energy and increases stress so choose to inspire and support rather than compare and compete.